crossesandguns: cain with a syringe full of poison (Default)
Hey, man, I hope you realize that although we've known each other 3, 4 years now, I don't appreciate it that the first thing you say to me, to greet me when we meet after a long time is "Legs". Maybe you mean it as an off-hand remark but I hope you realize that I felt weird and violated because my name is not legs and fuck it are you a child have you never seen legs before? Maybe you also did not realize, though I hope you did, that my smile was a grimace, I did not greet you back, and I was ready to kick you in the nuts.

I don't get it, we're not even close, we barely say two words to one another, yet you're the only one to call me that. You're a cool guy, but that behavior was firmly on uncool territory. Like the Doctor calling Amy 'Legs' and River 'Mrs. Robinson' in that one Moffat episode (I almost barfed at that because WHY WOULD THE DOCTOR SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT).

My father is the only guy allowed to comment if I wear something short because he is my father alright.

----

In other news, yesterday was fun! It was great to see AME people again. Got to bond with old mems and new mems alike. Also after 10 months of waiting, I finally have my diploma!
crossesandguns: japan in shock (emotion: shock)
I guess there's no better way to start this than by saying: OH WOW, I THINK I'M A GRADUATE!

Not in the official sense of the word, because I probably won't have a diploma until January, but yeah. After four (and a half) years, I'm finally through with college.

Now the problem is, where do we go next?

I mean, it's something every graduate must have thought about, right? One of those cliched post-graduation angst which-I-am-finding-is-actually-true. Everything before was laid out nicely by our parents, with a few nudgings from us along the way, and then it stops. From here, we've to man up and, pardon my French, grow some balls.

I don't have a clear sense of the future. Sure, I've some vague ideas of leaving something useful to the world, writing a book, etc etc, but the process, the journey, everything is unclear, heavy on the un. But then again, that's what makes it exciting, eh?

(I think my papa's more excited than me, actually. He's been bugging me to get an NBI clearance for god-knows-what purposes (yeah, for work, I guess). )

What bugs me are the expectations. Ma'am Batangan, in our 108 class, observed that in our generation, young grads are expected to succeed, in whatever they do after. According to her, back then, in their time, they were expected to fail, because they practically know nothing, and then were expected to learn from these failures. That's the thing, sometimes I feel like there's no room for failure in this universe.

Which is not true, btw, ask Einstein.

I should be happy that I'm a graduate, but my happiness is tempered with uncertainty. I am plagued with doubt, but there is no room for doubt in this brave new world.
crossesandguns: cain with a syringe full of poison (Default)
Stealing a few moments from my boring Bio review to say that

I'M WATCHING DOWNTON ABBEY
And I think I'm in love with Maggie Smith. As if I wasn't in love with her before.

Also, I didn't know [livejournal.com profile] damagectrl was writing for Heta_Ph again. And that [livejournal.com profile] peculuiarities did so too.

Awesome. Time to go back, maybe?

-----

I have a tumblr account, by the way!
It's juliebeefjerky. Where you'll find nothing but batboys, I'm sorry.

Two hours left and one chapter to go!
crossesandguns: cain with a syringe full of poison (Default)


So here's my desk! I rarely use it though, 'cause I'm only home for the weekends and most of my stuff I do at the kitchen table.
 
Let's explore, yay! ) 
crossesandguns: cain with a syringe full of poison (Default)
Tomorrow starts my last semester as an undergraduate, and I am a wee bit queasy. Mostly because my first subject is something I should have taken back when I was in second year. And now I'm forced to take it with sophomores. I don't know anybody but what the hell, let's get it over with.

I just really hope there wouldn't be introductions anymore. God, I really hate that part.

OH And I'm really excited about PI 100 (Rizal) too, since it's his 150th birthday anniversary on the 19th and surely, this is a good time to study Rizal. I hope they make us go to conferences and stuff, but even if they didn't, I'd go on my own anyway.

I'm starting Bio 102 (Vertebrate Anatomy) too, and even if it tried my patience and perseverance during enrollment, I'm looking forward to it. I know I have to give time for studying it, if I want a good grade, something higher than 2, and I'm hopeful. I don't want a repeat of Chem 31.

Also, I'm Doccom this year in AME. I'm really unfamiliar with what they do there but I'm willing to learn. Aaaand I'm pretty excited about Kami to Ki. It's been a long time since I worked in a newspaper/magazine (lol high school) and... ah... let's just say I wanna draw comics again.

------------

Fandom stuff, I've caught up to Kuroshit, Pandora Hearts, Detective Conan, B&R. I tried reading Angel Sanctuary and I never thought I'd say this about Kaori Yuki but... it doesn't amaze me. It's confusing and that incest angle is distracting. I mean, is it totally necessary for the story or is it just a fetish, 'cause... it's not cool. I think she said somewhere that she's curious about it because she doesn't have a brother, but I'm telling you, it's not cool. NOT COOL. I have two brothers and just the thought of that makes me wanna hurl ok. It's not just socially deviant, it's biologically harmful too. I guess this here is one of my limitations.

I have Death Note too, but I haven't started reading it, I saw it years ago. Finished 20th Century Boys AND THAT WAS MY MOST SATISFYING READ IN A LONG TIME. Damn. Urasawa-sensei, whew, I adore his clean art, clean panels, and the way everything connects neatly, even after several layers, in the end. The last time I felt this for a manga was with his Monster run. He might just be my most favorite mangaka ever. When I have money I'll collect him.

Enrollment lines made me start on Oliver Twist and I'm near the end now and I might actually start collecting Dickens too. THIS is the kind of writing I love: satirical, long-winding sentences that go for whole paragraphs and loses you somewhere in the way, making you backtrack to read it over again. Victorian era fiction, mmm, delicious.

Lastly, I have finished the four seasons of The Tudors and I love the way they speak their English. Three seasons into Criminal Minds and shoot, that was a cliffhanger. I need more. But because the semester's starting, I may not have time at all.

Pahabol na painting )
crossesandguns: cain with a syringe full of poison (Default)
Aaaah, so long out of the Internet and what awaits me? Enlistment frustration.

Bio 102 makes me wait until the last minute and then chooses a schedule where I already have 2 subjects enlisted and no alternative scheds. I LEFT WEDNESDAY-FRIDAY FREE FOR YOU AND YOU CHOOSE TTH DAMMIT. I just don't know what to do anymore.

Another round of bureaucratic boxing against the Bio staff. God help me.

-----

Anger aside, summer's been pleasant. I feel like I've accomplished a lot, actually. My brothers complain how there's too much time during the holidays and that they have so little to do, but then I complain how there's so little time and so much to do, to finish, to experience.

I want to do lots of stuff. There's so much in this world that's left unexplored, unappreciated. I want to see them, to smell, to taste, to feel them on my skin, to tap into this and that well of knowledge, to figure things out, to be surprised, to laugh in realization. There's a whole world out there to conquer, and I must find the means to do so.

Did you know that Leo da Vinci only slept for 15 minutes every four hours? That's roughly 1.5 hours everyday. And that's 22.5 hours left to pursue his interests - painting, architecture, inventions and the like - each day. Aaaand I'm actually starting to think of trying that too :D

I never could stay angry or sad for too long. Something always, always makes me smile. There's just so much good, so much beauty in this world that I can't help but be happy.

I'm shallow like that.



ON ANOTHER NOTE: The reason I'm not on the Internet much

1. I'm real lazy and I'd much rather finish my Criminal Minds DVDs (I'm on Season 3 already, bitches!)
2. My bros are hogging it.
3. I'm sleeping. When I'm at home, my body clock reverts to the limits of acceptable bedtimes. I'm already conked out by 12 midnight, I can't believe it.

I'll update fandom stuff later.
crossesandguns: cain with a syringe full of poison (Default)
I bombed my last 160 exam. I had Chem lec exams that same day, and I know that shouldn't be an excuse because I had one whole week to review for it and all I did was glance at my notes 30 minutes before the exam.

The irony is, I don't think I did a good job on Chem either. FML.

Day 12-21 of the meme wat )
crossesandguns: cain with a syringe full of poison (Default)

Sometimes, I'm surprised with the amount of free time I have. Even with Mon-Sat 7am-4pm schedules, I seem to have enough time for... things other than schoolwork. Of course, that just means I procrastinate schoolwork tremendously.

And sometimes I get the feeling that the universe is actually working for me; that even when I'm neck-deep in pressure, I still wade through alive; that even when I manage to screw things up, something happens to reverse it.

Maybe I'm just a lucky boss monster. Or maybe I'm just overestimating the good things that happen to me.

(But if karma is anything to believe in, should I be scared of what happens in the future?)


xoxox


DAY 2: Talk about your piercings or tattoos, if you have any.

The only piercings I have are on the ears, which weren't a conscious choice but my lola and parents' decision. I had them as far back as I remember.

My first earrings were an heirloom passed on to girls of my mother's side of the family. I never took them off, even when taking a bath or sleeping (maybe bc I didn't know how to work the lock). I passed them on to my younger cousin when I turned fifteen.

Mama got me white-gold earrings afterwards, but it only took a year before I lost one (maybe bc I finally knew how to work the lock). Nowadays I don't think I have anything real, and I very rarely wear whatever earrings (and other jewelry) I have. I used to feel incomplete without ring earrings, but people... move on :D

Just borrow Mama's if I need to.
crossesandguns: cain with a syringe full of poison (Default)
Yesterday I may have set a new record high for the stupidest thing I ever did: I walked, freaking walked, from SM North to Philcoa.

The reason was soo stupid I DENY its existence. Basically it was an amalgamation of bravado, impatience, delusional optimism and general stupidity.

------------------------------------------------

If you want to lose weight, or tone your biceps or quads, I suggest volunteering at a children's home. It's what's kept me busy today and last Saturday - NSTP at RSCC behind SM North.

We're virtual slaves to their yet-uncontrolled ids, ever at their beck and call, ever at their mercy. Children, toddlers especially, are selfish and centric. And yet so adorable.

But no matter, it was nice to see Psych 171 in action. I found the perfect example of Erikson's Initiative vs Guilt in a three-year-old child. Paraguay (*not her real name) wanted to dry herself off after the bath, and vehemently turned me and my ministrations away. She was a very sweet and intelligent child though, I learned all the other kids' names by asking her.

-------------------------------------------------

And so, last Saturday, after "work", I wandered around SM North as I was prone to do so. (You might deduce that I like walking. It's true.) And 3 things happened.

1 was a conscious decision. My first stop was Comic Quest because... it was awesome and routine. And their displays were awesome too. Anyway, my heart stopped at their first, left-most display case - ALMOST EVERY BATMAN TRADE since... uh, the Morrison run, I guess. There was, like, Batman RIP, Battle for the Cowl, Bats and Robin, Hush, Heart of Hush, Batman and Son, the NEIL GAIMAN Batman (Did he, really? I-I have to read this is there a Sandman crossover) etc etc. I think I drooled a bit. Just a li'l. I thought I saw the new Batman Inc there too.

2 Downcast because I can't possibly afford those books, I walked across and down towards an appliance center, where their LCD TV was playing The Dark Knight. I-I feel like a dastardly fool 'cause I haven't... really... watched... this. And the thing that was going on in my head was: WHY IS THE GREEN GOBLIN GETTING KILLED BY THE JOKER? I now know it wasn't Willem Dafoe, but William Fichtner.

3 Third time's the charm. NBS was always one of my SM stops. What better to greet me than a tarp advertising the chance to win tickets to the San Diego ComiCon for every DC book purchased. Well played, NBS, although I have a question. Does this include the superhero children's books too?

---------------------------------------------------
when the kids are asleep, i sketch )
crossesandguns: cain with a syringe full of poison (Default)
This campaign flyer just made me laugh for some reason.



Blurred because I am non-partisan :D



Apparently, Supes can speak Filipino.

VOTING LATER! EXERCISE OUR RIGHT YEAHHH

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